Tanker...

[inovember]

 

Make the most out of everyday. Tell me something I don`t know. I try. Believe me. But I sometimes- and to be frankly honest- often- can not manage to do this. Sometimes I just pray that the day will be over. Said something wrong, to feel disliked at work, having a loved one who shows his tired of you, who does not care to ask how you really feel- when seeing you cry. I just want to disappear then. It is hard having this feeling. The feeling of being all alone. Like no one would care if you were to be gone. I feel angry. Angry that I have allowed myself to be treated this way. Angry that it has gotten this fare. But mostly angry that it looks like this is how my life has turned out. Feeling unhappy. Not good enough. Not good enough. I have tried- tried to change. But I should not have to. People have liked me before. Treated me nice. I feel scared. Scared of the future. See I don`t know what to do next. How to find a solution. So I spend everyday trying to do right. Hide my sad face and put on a smile. I smile. The only thing I know how to do right now.